Am I Still Your Hero?
by A'Rion Larent
Summary: Kara's returned from her multiverse adventures and is confronted by dark thoughts, so she takes a night to drown her misery at the alien bar. Supercorp w/ a dash of angst. One Shot! Maybe... I have a tendency to add a bit here and there.


A/N: As happy as I was to see Lena return to the series, I wasn't necessarily thrilled with shipping her with James. I love James, he's a good guy, but I don't really see this 'chemistry' that apparently him and Lena seem to have. To me it seems rushed and sloppy, and neither of those characters deserve some half-baked romantic story line. Anyhow, I've written this to kind of blow off some steam before getting back to me medieval AU.

 **Am I Still Your Hero?**

It had been a shit week for Supergirl, and an even shittier week for Kara Danvers. Between figuring out there was a Nazi version of her in existence (well no longer, considering she combusted in her arms earlier this week), and returning to see Mon-el completely enamored with his gorgeous wife, she had resolved to do the only thing that someone in her situation could do-head to the bar with hopes of drowning out the clamoring noise of her unsteady breathing and uneven heartbeat. Quickly she ordered an aldebaran deadly and sat in the furthest, darkest corner of the bar.

As she twirled the metal tumbler in her hand, she couldn't believe how derailed her life had become ever since her trip to Earth-54. She had met Overgirl… an alternate version of her that had landed in the "Fatherland" in a world where Germany had prevailed in WWII, and somehow that entailed her conversion to Nazism and her superiority complex. She had always believed that being a source of good and righteousness was a constant, that she would always be a hero to all, but Overgirl had been stark proof that, that wasn't completely true. Apparently, she could have been evil given certain circumstances. Her skin prickled with goosebumps as an unpleasant chill ran through her bones.

She shot back the alcohol and cringed as it burned down her throat.

And she had been married to Oliver! Of all the people she had ever pictured herself with, he hadn't even made the list, but lo and behold Overgirl seemed to be the embodiment of 'nevers' that Kara had listed down throughout her life. She was glad that little detail hadn't been shared with the rest of the group; it was awkward enough seeing Nazi Oliver and Kara as an actual thing. The thought alone caused her to order yet another drink.

The only good thing that had come from meeting Overgirl was the chance to observe how Kara might look like in a super suit that consisted of pants. She'd have to talk with Winn about the whole skirt thing. Still, seeing her metahuman friends had been a distraction for the most part, and saving the world from an invading Nazi regime was satisfying to some extent. However, soon after returning back to her Earth, seeing Mon-el with his wife hadn't gotten any easier. Mon-el had loved her; she had thought this to be a constant, yet the universe (multiverse included) seemed adamant in pointing out that nothing was constant.

"Another," she said as she raised the empty tumbler above her head.

After being brought yet another drink, Kara tried to place her feelings for the returned Daxamite. When she had sent him off into space because of the lead-filled atmosphere, the dominant feeling inside of her was fear. Fear that she had sentenced Mon-el to his death, that he would be alone, and so would she. She felt bitter, having to give up one more thing for the greater good, but she hadn't been the first to do it. Lena had paved the way when she had chosen to save Kara at the expense of her ex-lover's life. In a way, knowing what to do with Mon-el had come easily because there was always the chance that he would be able to come back… in Lena's situation there hadn't been even that small saving grace. The dramatic turn of events had amplified her feelings for the Daxamite… she had grown to like him, but love… it's what she told herself she felt so that she wouldn't lose the connection to the man she had shipped into the darkness of space.

He wasn't the best, he had an erroneous amount of flaws, but Kara had felt needed by Mon-el and that grounded her to some extent. Lena did the same for her, minus most of Mon-el's flaws, but she didn't deserve someone like Lena… not when she had been lying to her this whole time. And now Mon-el was married to some Greek goddess turned human with whom she could not find one reason to hate, and, to be honest, Mon-el seemed the better for it. Gone was the loud, abrasive, cocky, selfish Daxamite he had been, and in his place was a calm, rational, humble, decent guy… a guy she could have actually fallen in love with.

Someone like Lena, Kara thought with an amused smile, but pushed away the invading thought as quickly as it had come.

She had been awkward enough to invite the time-traveling couple to her Christmas party, and Mon-el had been sensible enough to reject the offer. He seemed anxious to return to his time… she wondered what that even looked like, and if being here was just some antiquated trip for him. Kara had become a relic of the past, some kind of beacon of hope for the fighters of the future.

Kara reminisced over her recent Christmas party. Her apartment was perfect for any kind of holiday get together; it was cozy, warm and festive by nature, and thanks to Alex and Winn, this year they had decked her halls with all kinds of lights and decorations. Lena and Sam had been her newest additions to the Super friends, even if they had no idea that, that is what they had been inducted to.

Kara downed the drink as her next thoughts rushed forward.

Lena.

She had looked absolutely stunning in that dress that revealed a good portion of her back, but then again Lena made most things look beautiful. She had long admired her best friend, and how could she not? Lena was powerful, beautiful, intelligent and kind. She was always busy, yet somehow she had made Kara Danvers feel like one of the most important people on this planet. She didn't have to be Kryptonian, and she didn't have to be Supergirl to be somebody to Lena.

 _But you, Kara Danvers, are my hero._

The memory flitted in Kara's mind, bringing warmth along with it. She was Lena's hero… or so she had thought, until she overhead Sam and Lena's conversation over James. She had been putting a bottle in the fridge when she picked up on Sam's hushed voice, and immediately her eyes glanced over to James who was making heart eyes at Lena. Quickly, she had glanced away and wondered when that had happened. When had James ever looked at Lena that way? James 'never trust a Luthor' Olsen… though admittedly, she was happy that he had reconsidered his position on Lena. Then she glanced at Lena, and couldn't quite read her body language. She seemed aloof but there was something different about her… maybe she liked James too.

"One more," Kara demanded with a shout towards the bar.

The bartender nodded and came with the requested drink, "you're knocking them back a bit fast, no?"

"Pfft, I'm alright," Kara replied steadily and shooed the bartender away.

She sipped at this one, letting its bitter taste sit on her tongue for far longer than was pleasant. James had taken a bullet for Lena, and Kara supposed that suddenly made him worthy of Lena. So she did what any good friend would do, she egged Lena on, telling her that there was definite chemistry between the two. The Luthor had made several comments to dissuade both her and Sam, but Kara figured it was her modesty at play. The rest of the night passed by pleasantly enough, Alex was smitten with Ruby and Sam, Space dad was busy fighting with his space dad and Winn over music selection, and James made any excuse possible to stand by Lena, so she did her best to not hang around the Luthor so much, in case they were waiting for some kind of opening. Later that night, when everyone had gone, she felt as if she had made a mistake… and she regretted her words as she lay alone in bed, softly crying into one of her pillows. She hated her human heart and wondered why she hadn't learned her lesson the first time around. Kara Danvers was great, but she always got hurt; Supergirl, on the other hand, was nearly invincible.

 _But you, Kara Danvers, are my hero._

The memory reeled again but this time it was more painful. Kara had saved Lena a number of times. She had rescued her from a damaged helicopter, shielded her from flung L-corp property, flown her away from the blast of Metallo's unstable kryptonite heart, caught her as she plummeted off the edge of her balcony, rescued her from the Daxamite queen, threatened Edge the first time he made a threat towards Lena and eventually ended up saving her from one of his murder plots. As Supergirl, Kara had taken more than bullets for Lena. And Lena… Kara could go on forever about all the ways the Luthor had saved her or aided her in saving the day; the woman was a hero of earth, whether she believed it or not.

 _Supergirl may have saved me, but you, Kara Danvers, are my hero._

Kara groaned as Lena's voice taunted her. Lena had never shown any interest in Supergirl… in fact, she was nicer to Kara in her cardigans than she ever was to her in her cape. That had made all the difference in the world to Kara; it was yet another way that Lena Luthor had validated the necessity of her existence as Kara Danvers. But now what was the point? No one needed Kara, no one loved Kara the way she wanted, needed to be loved. Sure, Alex was always there for her, but two women with aching hearts wasn't necessarily a remedy in and of itself.

In anger she raised the tumbler to her lips and swallowed the burning alcohol, crushing the base of it as she put the cup back down on the table.

She pulled out her phone clumsily and made sure not to crush the buttons.

Kara: I thought I was your hero

Without a second thought, Kara sent the text and ordered yet another drink. Before the bartender could come collect her crushed, metal tumbler, her phone began to vibrate. She knitted her brows together and stared hard at the name on her screen. It was Lena.

"Hello?" Kara slurred.

"Kara? Are you alright?" Lena's distress always carried over so easily.

"I'm the best," Kara responded and then hiccuped. "Best of the best."

"Are you drunk?"

"... maybe," Kara answered warily. "What are you doing?" Kara asked.

"Oh, well I was out," Lena began.

With James, thought Kara as she bit her lip and swished the drink in her hand.

"Then I should let you go," Kara spoke in a hushed tone.

"You don't sound alright, Kara where are you?"

"It doesn't matter," Kara slurred heavily and paused before asking, "why not me, Lena?" She grew bold as the liquor muddied up her inhibitions.

"What do you mean?" Lena asked.

"Am I still your hero?" Kara's voice grew smaller; afraid of the answer that Lena would give.

"Kara, I need you to tell me where you are, now." Lena demanded.

Kara sighed and then looked at the bartender who was eyeing her with worry.

"I'm at the bar."

"Which bar?"

"The alien bar," Kara said it like it should have been obvious.

The line went dead and Kara frowned. Lena sounded mad, it was a tone of voice she didn't often use with Kara. She was most likely annoyed that Kara had interrupted her outing with James. James… she still couldn't wrap her head around James' sudden attraction to Lena. He had never defended Lena before, and before she had bought Catco, he rarely had anything nice to say about her. Still, maybe being around Lena had been enough for him to realize how utterly awesome she was.

As she leaned back on the booth seat, she saw a mirage of Lena take a seat in front of her.

"Golly, she's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen."

The mirage visibly blushed and Kara smiled; if only the real Lena would blush for her.

"Kara," Lena spoke up and only then did Kara's eyes go wide.

"Lena!" she exclaimed as she sat up straight.

"Kara, how many of these have you had?" Lena raised the filled glass that was on the table.

"Not enough for this," Kara slurred and reached out for the drink, but Lena was quicker.

"Maybe I'll take this one," Lena offered.

"No, you can't," Kara warned. "It's not for… people like you."

"People like me, what's that supposed to mean?" Lena sighed and handed the drink to the bartender who had come by to assess the situation, "we're fine, thank you."

Kara crossed her arms and muttered, "I was fine." She hiccuped immediately afterwards.

Lena looked into Kara's glazed eyes, "did you come here alone?"

Kara grinned. "As alone as could be."

"I think maybe I should take you home," Lena offered, but Kara didn't budge.

"I don't want to," Kara said. "Look, you can go back on your date or whatever it was you were doing."

Lena raised a brow, "date?"

"Or whatever," Kara added.

Lena shook her head, "Kara I wasn't on a date, and even if I was, I wouldn't leave you here like this. Obviously something is bothering you."

"Pffft, you think." She responded somewhat abrasively, but immediately regretted it and apologized. "Just go, please…" Kara said with a strained voice. "I don't want you to see me like this."

"I believe you were there for me when I drank that whole bottle of wine at Sam's house, so no, you don't get to order me away." Lena stated matter-of-factly and then softened her gaze. "Kara, tell me what's wrong."

"No," Kara sighed, "you won't get it."

"Won't get what?"

"Being me, you just won't get it." Kara slurred and started to massage the temple of her head. "I fought the Nazis, realized I would look better in pants, came back, Mon-el is married and suddenly James is head over heels about you, and things are probably going to spiral way out of control soon… it's like the shifting sand dunes on Haron, nothing feels stable beneath my feet."

Lena's jaw nearly dropped as Kara casually gave away even more of her secret identity.

"Kara this isn't fair," Lena began, but was cut off by a rather powerful glare from Kara.

"Fair?" Kara huffed, "when is anything ever fair?"

"You're drunk," Lena said. "You don't know what you're saying, and if by chance you do, then I doubt you meant to confess some of the things you just did."

"Confess?" Kara tilted her head to the side, "I said James was head over heels for you, not me, right? Or did I say me… because then yes, I didn't want to confess that just yet because the timing is just awful, and I'm dealing with a time traveling, married Mon-el on top of that" Kara's slur was getting worse, but Lena caught on to the meaning regardless. "Rao, did I just… I mean, golly, I can't believe I just told you I want you, I mean like you," Kara groaned as the words in her head mixed up violently. "You know what, it doesn't matter." She raised her hands up in defeat and leaned back in the booth once more.

"Kara… I didn't know," Lena's voice was shaky. "I suspected many things, but… honestly, _that_ was never one of them. Is that why you sent that text?"

Kara broke eye contact and looked out the window. "I just… thought I was your hero. Kara Danvers… not Supergirl, not James, just me. Selfish, I know… but still, it was all I really had for awhile."

"Kara, you were the one that said James and I have chemistry," Lena argued. "I thought that was your gentle way of telling me you had no interest in me."

"James is a good guy, and you deserve good… James probably wasn't a Nazi in any of the multiverses."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Lena muttered and stood up from her seat.

Kara looked at her with sadness in her eyes; she didn't want Lena to go.

"Wait, don't go," she pleaded.

"I'm not," Lena scooted in beside Kara. "God, Kara, what did you drink? You reek of it."

Kara pouted, "it's the only thing that works for me. Mon-el showed it to me."

"Mon-el, figures," Lena muttered, but moved on. She wasn't sure about half the things Kara had drunkenly admitted, but she'd be damned if the girl insisted on believing that she didn't believe in her. "And for the record Kara, you are still my hero."

Kara observed Lena's piercing green eyes and searched them for any kind of hesitance; she found none.

"Why didn't you ever fall for Supergirl?" Kara blurted out. "She saved you a billion times."

"Fall? I'm not some romantically starved teenage girl with a superhero complex," Lena teased. "That, and I was distracted by someone else."

"Oh," Kara's voice carried over her dismay.

"Had I known for sure that they were one in the same, I might have had a little more fun with it." Lena boldly admitted.

"Guardian?" Kara asked.

Lena rolled her eyes, "What, no? How is it that you're even more difficult whilst drunk? No, Kara, you."

"Me?" Kara pointed at herself, but her lack of depth perception caused her to jab at her eye. "Agh," she yelped and rocked back.

Lena laughed but took hold of Kara's hands to keep her from injuring herself further.

"Let's get you home. We can talk about this tomorrow when you're sober." Lena offered again.

"No," Kara's lower lip quivered as she thought of her apartment. "I don't want to go home. At least you're here, and even if you're not, there's alcohol. I'm so tired of feeling alone, of having to be strong when I feel weak, of having to be okay with things that I really don't feel okay about." Her voice cracked at the end, and Lena's heart along with it.

Lena pulled the blonde into her arms as she broke down in soft sobs. Kara held on to Lena's shirt as all of her pain came gushing out, and even as she felt herself breaking, she felt safe in Lena's warm embrace. Lena shushed into her ear and caressed her head in hopes of comforting the broken girl. She had never been too good at comforting, but things with Kara came more naturally than she'd like to admit. Seeing her so sad was enough for Lena to withdraw any and all of her defense mechanisms.

"I wish you had stayed after the party," Kara whispered into Lena's blouse.

"Well someone seemed adamant on shipping me off with Mr. Olsen." Lena commented somewhat snarkily. "Believe me Kara, if you had asked, I would have."

"Stay with me?" Kara asked.

"Of course, let's go now." Lena murmured and helped Kara off of the booth.

"I can fly us," she ended with a hiccup.

"As you know, I'm not fond of flying, even less so by drunk Supers. My driver is waiting outside."

"Awww," Kara whined but followed Lena's lead as she slid into the backseat.

When they pulled up to Kara's apartment, Kara opened the door to Lena's car, but when she tried nudging it further open with her foot, the door went flying out. Quickly Kara dashed after it, and managed to nab it before it caused further destruction.

"Kara!" Lena exclaimed, "I think I can appreciate how cautious and graceful you are when you're sober even though you seem like a clumsy human."

"Heyyyy," Kara pouted once more, "it was an accident, but I think I'll never be able to afford the door to your car."

"It's fine," Lena sighed as she instructed her driver to take the car into a shop tomorrow morning. "Let's just make our way up, shall we?" She asked and offered her arm to Kara.

When they entered Kara's apartment, as Lena led Kara to her bed, the blonde suddenly gasped.

"Lena."

"What?" Lena asked somewhat frantically as she looked around for signs of danger.

"Look," Kara pointed up with a goofy grin.

Lena's eyes cautiously went up and when she caught sight of what had caused Kara so much alarm, she nearly dropped the girl in her arms.

"Mistletoe," Kara murmured.

When Lena looked back down, Kara's gaze lingered hopefully on her lips.

"Kara, I can't," Lena said in a hushed voice.

"Oh," Kara said, quickly casting her gaze down.

"I want to, but…" Lena floundered for the right words, "there's just some things we need to talk about, and you're drunk."

"Maybe I just needed some liquid courage… I think that's what Alex called it." Kara replied. "You're just so pretty, inside and out, and your lips," Kara said as she absentmindedly brushed her thumb over Lena's lips, "look so good."

Lena's heart hammered against her ribcage as Kara's fingered lingered.

"Kara Danvers, I need you to behave." Lena murmured as Kara began to trace her lower lip softly.

"Kara Zor-el," Kara corrected with a boop to Lena's nose, both actions which reeled Lena back into reality.

"I hope to god you remember everything you've let spill today." Lena said crossly. She was trying her best to be mad at Kara, but her devious smirk and bright eyes made it nearly impossible.

"I want to be your hero, Lena," Kara stated firmly and the crease between her brows became prominent. "I want you to know that I'm your hero, no matter what I'm wearing, pants or skirt, or even nothing."

Lena blushed at Kara's impromptu speech.

"You are going to be the end of me," Lena sighed.

"No, never! I'd rather die," Kara responded with the most grave expression.

"Kara, it's just an expression," Lena said with a worried chuckle, "and don't you ever die for me. Live for me, instead. How about that?"

Kara nodded happily and leaned in quickly to leave a kiss on Lena's cheek.

"We'd be offending the mistletoe if nothing happened," Kara explained in a whisper, afraid that the mistletoe might hear her.

"You are a devious dork," Lena said with a chuckle.

"But still your hero right?"

"Always."


End file.
